Oh Tiger Woods...

You say that you are "dismayed to realize the full extent of what tabloid scrutiny really means" and that "personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn't have to mean public confessions."

Um. You're a celebrity darling. Don't you know that yet?


Celebrities are not held to the same standards of privacy as normal citizens. It's sort of what celebrity means. The fact that you thought you could have an affair with a 24-year-old cocktail waitress and keep it a secret makes me giggle. If heads of state can't put the kaibosh on their extra-marital affairs, what makes you think you could do the same?

You are a superstar in the world of gold and, heck, athletics as a whole. You are good at your job. You are a role model for athletes of all ages. Is it too much to ask that you also be a good person? I mean, I THOUGHT you were a good person. You have a nice smile, you don't throw temper tantrums, you have a lovely wife and a child, and you are close to your family. I suppose I just assumed you would have a semblance of respect for that.

But, you are a celebrity. You have wanton needs that can't be fulfilled by everyday life. What's a sexy little cocktail waitress here and there -- especially if they spell their name Jaimee? No big deal...right?